Thursday, July 12, 2012

The Silver Lining

With Bouzette watching from above, we set out on our three day vacation to the beach with Charlotte.  It's the first time she had gone with us in the car except for her trips to the vet each year, so she was very nervous.  Little did she know that her whole world was about to open up!  She got to take walks on the beach, chase the birds, sniff out the rest of the dog kingdom,  dine under tables and greet well-wishers. She travelled to my mom's and took her post on the porch chair--her look-out station! She made friends with the neighbor cat and took naps in the garage "close" to my dad.  She kept looking to us for guidance and we kept giving her the go-ahead.  Go ahead! This is the silver lining moment! Take it and run!

"Hold Your Breath!"

This is the picture of the cupboard where I hang my t shirt and bra each time I go to get my mammogram.  Today was the day. The clothing looks so innocent hanging there and as I close the cupboard door I wonder if I will be ok--be the same me, when I come back to open it again.

We women have to keep our sense of humor for this exam.  A breast on a tray?--almost laughable until that press comes down and removes any glimpse of a smile.  "Hold your breath!" the technician says. I want to tell her that I hold my breath for months leading up to my exam --praying that all will be well.
 But I don't say anything...I can't! I'm holding my breath!

Once this is over and I'm seated next to the doctor, I am grateful that he tells me right away that everything looks good.  I feel my breath start up again and I am so happy to see whatever he wants to show me on the screen.  We make small talk--usually about how amazing my mother is and how good my genes  are and I feel myself smiling easier.

Back to the cupboard I go---time to gather the "goods" and put them back where they belong. Tonight when I get home, I will  get my celebratory gold bra as I do every year and wear it for the rest of the day.  Breathe, I tell myself---good for another year!